Photo: The Tree of Life, 2011

Do you believe you are shaping our world? Where are you today, reading this?

I have experienced, heard, and seen, over and over, the influence a mother has on the lives of men. The actions of our mothers, showing up in childhood and adult life, shape who we are and who are becoming.

A simple AI search shows the evidence is strong: 

A mother serves as a significant role model, demonstrating behaviors, values, and life skills that a son can emulate. She can inspire her son to dream big, pursue his goals, and develop a strong sense of self-worth. A man’s relationship with his mother can influence his understanding of relationships with women and his ability to form healthy and fulfilling partnerships. A positive mother-son relationship can help a man develop healthy boundaries, respect, and empathy in his relationships. Even as a man matures and establishes his own family, the influence of his mother is lifelong and can continue to shape his values, behaviors, and relationships. 

A son becomes a man who understands women through the lens of his mother.

He may likely set his expectations for women and a future partner through this lens. 

He may cling to or adapt the expectations from this lens to serve himself, or serve the woman in his life.

Mothers, here are two things to help reflect on who your son is becoming:

I’m convinced that how a son views and treats his mother is a strong predictor of how he will view and treat women, and his future wife. How is he treating you?

How you view and treat him may be a strong influence in how he views himself and how he will expect to be treated by the woman in his life. Do you always view and treat him as a child? Or do you view and encourage his growth as a strong, capable, confident and secure man?

Mothers, you are powerfully influencing the next generation of men. Come together and talk! Support! Encourage! YOUR son may marry HER daughter. You are raising sons who will shape the future! You can give this world healthy, confident, secure, loving, and serving men. 

There may be words, both within and outside of you, that try to tell you that you don’t matter, and what you are doing does not have an impact. This is not true. The stories of countless men, and my own story, prove this. 

Mothers, YOU are critical!

Mothers:

Do you notice healthy patterns in how your son treats and views you? Commend these! 

Do you notice any unhealthy patterns? Correct these!

It’s so important, as much as it is possible, for his father to be part of this journey. A father should be highly and actively involved in training and showing his son how to love, respect, and honor his mother. 

For Men:

Men, there is unity in this: we are ALL sons. We were wonderfully made and woven together within her. This gift of life is because of her!

Sons, how are you honoring your mother? 

Husbands, how are you honoring your wife, using what you learned with your mother?

Dads take some time today to talk with your son.

Men, encourage your mothers! Thank them for their role in shaping us.

Men, we need good examples to emulate in order to better bring honor to our mothers: https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/behold-your-mother

Thoughts or comments?

Alex Gerber

Gerberxc@gmail.com